a Symple creature unlettyrde

Twelve things that happened in 2012, fannish and otherwise:

1. My grandfather, who is over 80, retired from his dental practice after a series of strokes and other medical problems. Cue major family drama.

2. My job became a hellish nightmare, as much as I continued to enjoy parts of it and appreciate my co-workers. Eventually I had several soul-searching conversations with my supervisor, and by the end of the year we had found a good balance. I really hope things continue to improve, because I do love this job.

3. I dropped more or less off the face of the internet.

4. I fell in love with my cello instructor. This was a bad idea. I then tried to fall out of love with my cello instructor. This is still a work in progress. It probably doesn't help that we're still spending almost an hour together every week in what's really an unavoidably intimate context, but I've never claimed to have much instinct for emotional self-preservation.

5. I participated in Sherlock Remix. The story I wrote was tricky but thoroughly worth it, and I loved the story I got in return.

6. I took two weeks of vacation in the spring: a long weekend in Boston followed by almost two weeks in Scotland, visiting several of my best friends IRL. It was amazing.

7. I met up with verity in person! From there, I embarked on a cross-country roadtrip with a college friend. I couldn't really afford the vacation time, but it was still worth it. Our route was gorgeous, and I now have a shortlist of places to go back and visit once I have some serious camping and hiking time available.

8. I had a good year re: the MS, but I exchanged most of the usual anxiety issues for what I'm now ready to admit was a nasty bout of depression. This wasn't a great trade. I seem to have switched back over the last couple of days, though; not sure how I feel about that.

9. I moved downtown. This was an excellent decision. My new housemates are wonderful (thank you, Craiglist), and I am in walking distance of many of the things I love most about this city.

10. Despite moving much closer to my church, I have stopped going on a regular basis. This was not an excellent decision, and it's something I need to work on this year. I miss it so much.

11. I was absorbed into the current fandom zeitgeist--yes, I mean Teen Wolf. I'm still just lurking, but it is the best kind of crack.

12. I participated in Yuletide. My offering was fun to research and to write, and my gift was the Magicians fic of my heart.

So, not a great year, though the high points were quite nice. Things do seem to be getting better. I'm cautiously optimistic about 2013.

I hate to dump this and run, but I don't have the spoons for a long post right now. My Grandpa had a stroke two months ago, then was released; then they found multiple pulmonary embolisms right after Thanksgiving, but then he was released again; now he's been admitted with a blood clot in his leg. I spent most of yesterday evening over there, but I've had to work (and will again tomorrow), and there's so much other family stuff going on right now. And Christmas in there somewhere, in theory.

Had dinner with some of my dearest friends tonight and forgot about it for a few hours, but then I came back to a long update from my mother, and I don't even know. We're all exhausted and stressed, and things are just...crap. I love him so damn much.

Prayers and good thoughts appreciated. For my mother, too--she's been maintaining a painful balancing act with my grandparents as things have started to get difficult, and it's really hard on her.

Not dead, just tired. Ugh. I've been curled around myself like a hedgehog for weeks now in one of those funks where being with other people is just so exhausting (though not quite as exhausting as being with myself). Even online interaction feels like a painful effort. I'm at the point, though, of slapping myself upside the head and telling myself to get over it, which I'm sure I will do before long.

Relatedly, am probably defaulting on my femgenficathon story, because though the bulk of it is written I can't seem to iron it flat enough to be worth reading. Woe.

RL is actually treating me pretty well. Work is good--I feel valued, which is huge for me. Family life--well, my grandfather had a stroke a few weeks ago, which has resulted in all sorts of handwringing as my grandmother prepares (at last) to put the papers in order and sell his practice. He's doing quite well, in general, but he can't drive, and that's been a blow to both of them.

I went over last night to play trivia as a memory exercise, and what they had on hand was a Bible trivia game. OMG (advisedly) the hilarity! You get this little white piece (your "dove") and march it up the seven tiers of the rainbow to collect a heavenly crowns. The tagline: "The game where trivia is not trivial." My grandmother rather self-consciously acknowledged that she got it "from the Fundies". (You can tell because the quotes are all KJV, and instead of asking "from where" Moses fled to Midian, it asks "from which".) We aced the children's cards, which were all straight out of Sunday school with occasional quotes from parables and the Beatitudes, but the adult ones left us stumped. I mean, who actually remembers the mount where Aaron died?

Relatedly, my Tuesday night Bible study has started up again. I've missed those people, so that's all to the good.

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In other news, I borrowed an ebook version of Outlander for a work trip last week, and Oh. My. Goodness. I can't even. This is not exactly a rec, but...turns out it was precisely what I wanted for plane reading. Take that as you will.

I have also been asked to be a bridesmaid at my brother's wedding in the spring, which was very sweet of my future sister-in-law and which I'm happy to do, except it's just occurred to me that I'll need to do the dress thing. And the walking down the aisle thing, and the sitting at the long table at dinner thing, and presumably the bridal shower and bachelorette party thing. I expect I'll survive, but now I find myself looking ahead to April with mild terror.

Brother #2 (not the one with the girlfriend) has just flitted back into town after half a year installing security systems in Hawaii. He is full of Worldy Wisdom, now, he'll have us all know, not to mention the entertaining stories. I do love my family.

My word-count for today isn't that impressive, but I did put the finishing touches on the second part of Unlettered. That's only half of the third part to write, and then I get down to heavy research and restructuring.